The world is full of stupid people....

What happens when you take an Texan biker, and put him behind a tech support number?

You get tales of idiocy, or course...

old biyatch calls me to whine about aol and it bein slow..."hey we are not aol call them and bitch..not us" undaunted she says she will quit aol if WE don't speed it up..."Roadrunner is fast...im gonna quit you guys and go with them" im tellin her Lady we ARE roadrunner" and shes not gonna let the facts confuse her so to spite me she uninstalls aol....like i CARE?? hey get that primary dos partition while you are it ya dumbass..thats slowin ya down even worse than we are...shes near ballistic so she wants a supervisor...i give her aol support number and let her have at them as shes clearly an alzhimers case
posted by Hack Saw at 9:14 PM- Discuss this post-

Coffemaker at work finally...we keep it strong enough to put most people in the cardiac ward...evil black expresso that will make you short of breath of ya drink more than one...no ants in it either i think they would dissolve in this wicked shit if there were any. Coupla cups and the customer is telling us" Whoa slow down what were you saying?" My contract is a "black hole" for employees i am told...they run training class after class and throw techs in by the dozens but they can never get it full...i think most go insane or flee screaming after a few weeks
posted by Hack Saw at 7:26 AM- Discuss this post-

you know the days off to a great start...when at 8am sharp your first caller cant find the start button in windows.."Umm that little rectangular button in the bottom left of your screen? says start on it? has a little windows flag on it?" Since i used the word rectangular the customer reminds me hes not a "computer person" and i should go slower with him...shit how much slower is there?? maybe i should teach him his abc's and how to go potty or what??
posted by Hack Saw at 7:18 AM- Discuss this post-

customer from florida calls back after i helped them...gets a Pakistani guy near me..and requests they find me as they cant understand shit he is saying...they are rednecks and he cant understand them either so i have to transelate for him...people are actually requesting me now by name cause they know i tell em the facts..."Your email is HOSED and wont work for days so deal with it" most just want the truth about whatever is wrong in their area and not a buncha corperate propaganda...only people in california are poor sports and cant handle the truth "ok the server is down i understand that..so how do i get my email?" you dont..you can't..and you won't till we fix it "ok we understand, but till its fixed...how do we get it?"
posted by Hack Saw at 5:16 PM- Discuss this post-

Old couple calls in...she is hearing impaired and talks like she has no teeth and a mouthful of barbedwire...i can't understand a word..and she is transelating for her husband who is actually at the pc..and hes DEAF totally...i am yelling instructions so loud work comes to a standstill as other techs stop what they are doing to come watch me for amusement...finally a supervisor says just cut em loose they are hopeless...so i tell the old hag and she goes ballistic and begins a lecture about how we are discriminating against the hearing impaired....yea right we need to invest a few million for braile modems i guess...i end up feeling sorry for them as they prove to be deaf and stupid as well...
posted by Hack Saw at 5:08 PM- Discuss this post-

guy calls in..speaks Russian only...demands a Russian transelator...rolf like we got one of those...our policy lets us just HANG UP on you if we ask you to speak english 3 times and you fail to comply, so mr stalin here demands a supervisor..err apparently he knows that much english. I get my new supervisor ( a real wise guy if ya ever seen one) and i hear him yelling at the customer NYET NYET NYET....dos vedanya......(no no no goodbye) policy says if i do not speak english to every customer...even if i know their language..i can be fired Commies Go Home!
posted by Hack Saw at 5:02 PM- Discuss this post-