The world is full of stupid people....

What happens when you take an Texan biker, and put him behind a tech support number?

You get tales of idiocy, or course...

the usual irate customer calls in..."your service sucks and hasent worked since they installed it" a records check indicates he has has cable for 6 months...and has called in probably 3 times a day every day since install....i see the cheapskate has done a "self install" one of the curses of our business...they drop a cable modem in your house..hand you a cd and run. WITHOUT EXCEPTION...everyone who chooses this plan blows the shit up or cant get it working and the hapless and usually ignorant customers call us to bitch about why they cant connect. Just IMAGINE what some people do to their systems before they finally despair and give up...and call us to get connected.---part 1 of a series
posted by Hack Saw at 7:48 AM- Discuss this post-

one guy in another contract..pc hardware...had his customer...unknowingly...config his system so he cant make ANY changes on it or install any new software...made the dat file read only...apparently this fewl had called one too many times after blowing his shit up with new software that he didnt know about..thats what ya get when you call support SO MANY times that they know you by NAME
posted by Hack Saw at 7:41 AM- Discuss this post-

Worked on the phone for nearly an hr fixing what seemed to be bad dns entrys for an old redneck sounding dude...he was very co operative and appreciative when i finally got im connected...he sez "you ain't from around here are ya with that accent" so i told em i was from down south (the truth) and find out hes a "good ole boy" from SC...he invites me to a barbecue he having...i think fuck that all i need is burn meat and blue ribbon beer in the trailer park...doh hes a ceo at Nortel and i end up at what has to be one of the largest private estates in Texas..at a catered affair with live bands and roving strippers...with half the attendees in suits and driving up in bmws and porsches...i putt up in raggedleather on my current ratbike (57 panhead) and damned if the old dude dosent turn out to be a pretty cool guy..we get plastered at the totally stocked wet bar...served by what looks like a platoon of bartenders hired for the ocassion..and he gets on the bike...much to his stuffy old wifes horror and laps the estate a few times to the utter astonishment of his suit buddys..lol better be careful who i abuse on the phones now hehe
posted by Hack Saw at 7:37 AM- Discuss this post-

old lady calls in..."every time i send email to my friend the server rejects it..its sent back...why are you doing this to me?" after careful anylasis i kinda have to tell her that NO ONE has a friggin email address that ENDS with a hyphen--- she insistant that shes right and we are involved in some devious plan to keep her from writing her buddy...what can you tell someone when they are CERTIAN you are wrong and they are right...and they are drooling idiots?
posted by Hack Saw at 4:15 PM- Discuss this post-

muhaha last week i helped a cracker (native texan rednecks-like in the tv show king of the hill) setup his whole familys email..he wanted to use the newfangled IDENTITYS feature in the OutLook Express...so he calls back this week wanting the passwords...i thought he ment the pw for his email account...nope hes passworded every identity on his pc and none of his family can get their email...or even access their identitys to delete em and start over...rolfmao i forgot to tell im about that little feature hehe
posted by Hack Saw at 11:22 PM- Discuss this post-

mexicans call in...demand a transelator..."no habla espanol" i tell em..we only support english...we got no transalators and we are not hiring any..then i get a long lecture in spanish about discrimination and..using company policy...get to hang up on em for not co operating:) suckers try learning the language of the country ya live in...damnd if i would live in mexico and not learn to speak it..why live here and expect us to learn yours?
posted by Hack Saw at 10:55 PM- Discuss this post-

my buds on irc all know im STILL on dialup...despite living in the center of the 3rd largest metro area in the US...so today i really have little patience for the fool who calls in whining about his s-l-o-w d-ow-n-l-o-a-ds...he bitches and moans about canceling his accnt with us because" we have cut back his speed" his test download hits 1500kbps while i watch...and hes outraged i dont seem to care about the monumental unfairness of his plight...wahhhh ya bitch yer lucky im 1000 miles away is all i can say
posted by Hack Saw at 10:51 PM- Discuss this post-

family has called 10 times...they are apparently going to freak out because WE are blocking their 10 yr old daughters jr high schools site.. "everyone else can go to the site but us"...therefore its a conspiracy and time warner must be behind it...they have multiple trouble tickets and are demanding a supervisor after weeks of calling daily to see if we have revamped our entire system to make their page load...doh suprise we havent done shit about your miniscule problem and dont giv a rats ass that one page..out of the entire internet,,,wont load for ONE user account. Being the genius i am..i surmise their system is at fault because their dns files corrupt...and convince them to format their entire pc just to make that accursed page load. yes i coulda just replaced that file but hey let em format to teach em a lesson...it will fix it but its like tearing down a house to fix a cracked window...even funnier is the fact they go for it
posted by Hack Saw at 10:46 PM- Discuss this post-